Totally unrelated to robots, pirates, monkeys (or even ninjas): I probably should mention that my new book is out. It’s published by the weird and wonderful folks at BlueQ. It’s a nice little photo book of the sad chairs of St. Louis. No, really. Discarded chairs in alleys. Abandoned chairs on street corners. Abused chairs on loading docks. You get the picture. You’re gonna like it.

Check out www.50sadchairs.com to see some page samples and (if you want) by it at Amazon or Blueq.com.

C’mon!

…please excuse any hiccups while I get the cool old RPM design back up and running.

Switching web hosts… also migrating from Blogger to WordPress so please forgive any glitches for the next week or so as I categorize seven years worth of uncategorized posts and code the previous design into WordPress.

I’m working on a big RPM project and I want your suggestions for the coolest robots, pirates and monkeys ever. Now, of course I’ve got C-3PO, Blackbeard and Curious George on the list — I need suggestions for RPMs that might not be part of the fabric of popular culture. Or RPMs that are more underground. Or whatever.

So send me your ideas! You get bonus points for including a useful web link, but it’s not required. Everyone who contributes will have their name put in a hat and one random winner will receive a cool set of prizes (which will somehow include robots, pirates and monkeys).

The deadline? It may change, but let’s say March 15. Thanks!

It’s done! I finally did it. The Monkey vs. Robot covers compilation is done! The CD features seven covers of James Kochalka’s classic. Everyone who participated will get a copy and a special excellent prize. Here is the awesome list of people and bands that went and done good:

1 Bob Dorsey
2 Rudy Charisma
3 John Miner
4 Tha Shewz
5 Mike Watkins
6 Reddy Killsalot
7 Fandangoya
8 James Kochalka Superstar

Last call for RPM contest entries! I’ve got to end this contest sometime. Send me your cover versions of James Kochalka’s “Monkey Vs. Robot!” Everyone who enters gets a cool prize, and I’ll buy one winner something from their Amazon Wish List (priced within reason). You have until December 3, 2006.

I’ve reinstituted, extended and enhanced the RPM cover song contest! Just record a cover version of James Kochalka’s “Monkey Vs. Robot” and send the MP3 to me by the end of the year. YOU COULD WIN AWESOME ROBOT-, PIRATE- AND MONKEY-RELATED PRIZES!

Matt Haughey: “After several years, pirates just aren’t that funny anymore. I think they ran their course.”

It’s true that pirates (and monkeys and maybe even robots) are “out” now. They’re just not so cool anymore. But we don’t care, because we never were very cool. So we’re going to stand our ground and continue our public love for RPM. Just like that idiot who never stopped listening to Poison and Cinderella, we’re going to stick by our pirates until they become cool again. Someday. Then everyone will think, ‘Wow, that keaggy.com guy was always SO COOL!’

Thanks Mike. Here’s his easy-going version: Watkins-MonkeyVsRobot.mp3. Record your version and send it in by July 4.

Bob Dorsey steps up and delivers a kick-ass Kochalka cover (link to MP3). Make and send yours now and win fabulous prizes! I’m setting a deadline of July 4, 2005 for all entries, because I think there’s a decent chance a few of you out there will get drunk on the 4th of July and record yourselves singing James Kochalka’s “Monkey Vs. Robot.”

…and I was special too, I occasionally used GmailSwap to give away invites. Someone posted that they’d sing the song of your choice in exchange for an invite. So I asked him to sing James Kochalka’s “Monkey Vs. Robot.” I got one taker.

It was so good that I needed more. I wanted to make an entire covers album. But no one bit, and now everyone has Gmail. And I still want to make that album!

Listen to the MP3 linked below: It’s brilliant. Matthew Margotta (also known as Fandangoya) kicked ass, and I want more like it (or completely different from it). Please send in your contributions. I have swell prize packages for EVERYONE who submits (until I get at least nine more mp3s).

- Cover version: Matthew Margotta - Monkey Vs. Robot!
- Original version: James Kochalka - Monkey Vs. Robot!
- Lyrics: Get them here!

Please? Here’s a permalink to this post so you can tell all your friends. Email MP3s (or post a link and send it) to bill [[at]] keaggy [[dot]] com.

Thanks,
bk

“Meet the Heathkit HERO robots. HERO 1, HERO Jr, HERO 2000, and Arm Trainer base” (My dad gave me one of these over the summer but I need to do some work on it to get it functional. Probably a lot of work. A lot of work that’s beyond my knowledge. Oh well.)

- I have not been attacked by pirates.
- I do not have any monkey friends.
- I now own a robot! A 1980s robot!

A new design for RPM. About time. Some things may look/be broken (Archives mostly). All will be fixed soon, I hope. Hi!

The last 10 posts have all been robot-themed. Must switch to Pirate/Monkey mode. (Must redesign this tired page too!)

Note from bk, March 30, 2004: RPM started out as a fun, nonsensical weblog for employees of XPLANE. A lot of the early posts were not about robots, pirates or monkeys and were posted by various people. That’s why the Archives read a little weird. Also: The Official Dwayne F. Schneider Web Site.

The purpose of this weblog is to record dumb things that happen in the XPLANE office or to XPLANErs. If you want. Like when we were at lunch today and someone complained about how robot costumes can be really uncomfortable. And then there were several murmers of agreement. Because, apparently, most of people at the table had been dressed up as robots before. I thought that was funny.

Any XPLANEr can post here. This is how you make a link: <a href="PUT_URL_HERE">PUT_LINK_TEXT_HERE</a>. That’s all.