The most effective way to find and destroy a land mine is to step on it.

This has bad results, of course, if you’re a human. But not so much if you’re a robot and have as many legs as a centipede sticking out from your body. That’s why Mark Tilden, a robotics physicist at the Los Alamos National Laboratory, built something like that. At the Yuma Test Grounds in Arizona, the autonomous robot, 5 feet long and modeled on a stick-insect, strutted out for a live-fire test and worked beautifully, he says. Every time it found a mine, blew it up and lost a limb, it picked itself up and readjusted to move forward on its remaining legs, continuing to clear a path through the minefield.

Finally it was down to one leg. Still, it pulled itself forward. Tilden was ecstatic. The machine was working splendidly.

The human in command of the exercise, however — an Army colonel — blew a fuse.

The colonel ordered the test stopped.

Why? asked Tilden. What’s wrong?

The colonel just could not stand the pathos of watching the burned, scarred and crippled machine drag itself forward on its last leg.

This test, he charged, was inhumane.

“Pirates & Privateers began in 2000 as a monthly column with an article on Jean Laffite and a list of recommended pirate web sites. Since then, it has grown beyond my wildest dreams, and now includes book reviews and pirate adventures, as well as a newsletter that includes the latest pirate-related news and information. I thank you for your visit and your support. Within these pages, you’ll find articles on all aspects of maritime piracy from ancient times to modern day.”

“Drinky and Uncle Crabby debate philosophy and fight pirates in this pilot episode.”

We now interrupt the RPM weblog with a very important announcement: Today my book is released. It’s based on one of my web sites, grocerylists.org, and is published by HOW Books (publishers of Print and HOW magazines and a wonderful variety of design books).

“Milk Eggs Vodka: Grocery Lists Lost & Found” features nearly 300 discarded grocery lists from all over the U.S. — and a few from around the globe. The foreword is written by Jim Coudal, of Coudal Partners and Museum of Online Museums fame. Sorted into surprisingly obvious chapters (lists with poor spelling, healthy vs. unhealthy lists, lists made by elderly people or people planning parties, lists with drawings, doodles and notes on them, etc.), each list is displayed, dissected and commented on. You’ll probably never leave your list in the grocery cart again.

Where else will you find a 2,000-year-old grocery list, lists from all 50 U.S. states, the most commonly misspelled words on Americans’ shopping lists, delicious recipes made using only ingredients listed on other people’s discarded lists, a shoplifting list and a chance meeting with Chevy Chase in the bathroom at Yankee Stadium? Where? (Probably nowhere.)

But why collect found grocery lists? Because lists tell us a lot about our neighbors, our friends, our ancestors, our species and ourselves. They’re supposed to be private and that’s why it’s so enjoyable to look through the ones that people discard — unless one of those lists happens to be yours. Then it might not be so enjoyable, because if there’s one thing I like more than finding a lost grocery list — it’s making fun of it.

Order MEV from Amazon U.S.
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I also made a promo site at milkeggsvodka.com (with a new blog here to document the weird journey of releasing and promoting the book). This was an extremely fun project to work on — and I think you’ll find it pretty fun to read as well. If you like food, freaks and/or Found Magazine, you’ll dig this.

—Bill Keaggy